Daddy God's beloved child
somehow, being tired or satisfied after a full day just lets you totally unwind at that point of time. and appreciate the other things that you now have less time for. the friends and the fun on weekends... music that you can listen to. it was nice to just unwind. Now i know why some people just come back and chill by watching anime or gaming. haha. just need to unwind.
was my first day of work at my new place today!
a first permanent position.. or almost permanent position after a probation period. i'm still unravelling things.. trying not to be too lost, getting little bits here and there, being observant. learning to catch things fast. haha. observe observe... and not get too tired out in the middle. I realised cos i've been having free itme for so long, now getting back into work shape, needs a little bit more pushing. I'm thankful that I get to put anointing oil on myself before going to work... and that Jesus is with me. Without it, I would be much more lost..
somewhere in the beginning, i wondered what i was doing there.. questioned is it really the place for me?? or am i just following the easy way just because it seems to have open doors? and wondering whether it would be challenging enough for me.. well. it got better as the day progressed. got to research on interactive media stuff! well a little only. and read some of the p5s math. hmm, well i will learn more about it as time progresses.
well, it will be good. I believe and trust God that He has placed me here, and I will be a blessing to these people.. even when I'm tired or don't particularly like what I'm doing, when i sang that short worship song.. out from me came the sense that, just be faithful to this.. just be faithful in this. and I know God will help me, lead me in all things and into paths of success. Let me rest.. in this year of Restful Increase.
01:02 a.m.
I am Afraid, I hear myself say. And in the saying, I practice the presence of Fear, rather than rest in the safety of God. Jesus says His Spirit within me is one of power, love, and a sound mind. But He whispers while Fear is loud.
Fear screams for me to run.
Fear pushes me to produce protection.
And so I stand on rock and watch as the sand sinks swiftly down.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
coming home on the bus today, listening to my ipod on my in-ears... for one of the first times in a while, I just sat and enjoyed the music.. not thinking about anything much else, but just really enjoying it.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Overcoming Fear
But God beckons me, Come.
But God whispers I have already overcome.
To be love-led rather than fear-driven is to stand on the rock underneath.
07:12 p.m.
a new season coming up.. stepping into it full fledged. work commences on monday, and love commences.. has it commenced? haha. not officially i guess.
but one thing that's happened in this past month is also that i've been missing a bit of spending time with the Lord. I've been so caught up with other stuff, put so many other things above that.. and i guess something in me misses that, and yet procrastinates to do so.
before wed prac, i played on my piano a little.. and got that worship feeling. not even practising, but basking in the song for a while. it's really been pretty long since i've done that. and today i listened to the Rest sermon twice.. it's just a good reminder.. and i realise now, something that i have to keep reminding myself, or deciding to do. i know Jesus misses me too, cos He's been calling out to me in that small still voice, but sometimes I don't always listen.
deciding to rest once again. to make decisions based on that peace and presence, not my emotions or other factors.. to rest again. not diving straight into things but taking time to know that I'm trusting in the Lord that it is good. even in small things. taking time to enjoy His presence. To know that His lovingkindness is better than life.. is better even that what I enjoy now. To work and do out of rest, not out of clockwork motion.
to sleep now. :)
Friday, July 23, 2010
loving life.. loving the past few weeks that have gone by. so many things have happened, but all very sweet. :)
gd nights. :)
12:17 a.m.
today was our 2nd rehearsal for the Zone Musical. It was AMAZING.
started out with songs... when Cheryl mentioned that to us on Tues, I was actually unsure of that.. maybe cos I hadn't envisioned what it really meant to be working on a musical. means the music is a very large part of it actually. So she said, she'll give us 2 hours to do.
so, do, we did. just two hours the day before, we came up with parts and stuff to add on to the song. And today, hearing a team that CAN sing well, (amazingly.. blown over, melting and awe-ing..) doing their parts well, in harmony, was like. WOAH. it's coming together in a way I never even imagined. I love the people, they have such hearts and excitement and onz-ness to serve and be a part of this. No matter how large or small the role is, the desire to just be a part of it, was evident. :)
Hearing opening song come together in the morning, it was wow.
Love song for the two leads, another wow. I never knew our girl could sing like that! very nice. as we polish it up more and they get more into their characters... I know that it will be so awesome, for there is much grace, even in this short periods of time that we have to do stuff. can hear the anointing in their voices, as well as the director and team's anointing to bring all that out of our cast. Cheryl's direction is amazing, and also fun and enjoyable. Character exercises...and i laugh at them. so funny sometimes.
so despite tiredness and my natural gg on to 'chiong' for music things.. (people have to tell me i'm tired before i know it), well. it is satisfying. :))) feel happy to be used in this musical, and things we have never done bfore (me and diana discussed abt this..) wow. we see that we are able to do it now. just stepping into it. Benjamin generation.. a generation graced 5 times more. God's doing wonderful and powerful things :)
Saturday, July 10, 2010
feeling really really tired now... haha. but satisfied.
08:44 p.m.